Fred knew he was on the bubble. Federal workers all knew that, and he was a newbie, on probation since he\u2019d been hired here in Canyon County from the station back east. His expertise was grass and range and he thought this should be the promised land.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He loved meeting with the producers in Owyhee County. They had their acres and cows and knew the seasons, the grasses, the problems. He knew the invasives, the problems, and they had good sense. It was simpatico. He thought they deserved some support. Heck, they\u2019d been there for generations.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He sometimes didn\u2019t like the Canyon County requests for government money.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
There was the Ethiopian lady raising vegetables for the local market. She needed a hoop house to get her plants started early. It wouldn\u2019t cost much, and he thought she\u2019d be helping out the local markets. He tried to explain to her the forms she\u2019d need to fill out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
That was his job. He had to approve requests for government funding to improve the production of their land.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
In Canyon County, \u201crangeland\u201d required quotation marks, since these applicants\u2019 raised alpacas or show horses. A center pivot funded by federal dollars to have more Clydesdales. Well, that was his job.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But today he had to go to Ada County. Somebody wanted to get federal dollars for their fifty acres on the hills above the Capitol. Ada County sucked. And federal dollars can be the fire hose.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Fred got his papers on the front seat of his rig. This government issue vehicle might be soon dispatched, he knew. As might be his job. He sighed and drove into the pit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The site was up in the foothills. A McMansion and asphalt showed him where to park. Down in the Owyhee, it was dust and tire tracks he followed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cHello, Mr. James, I\u2019m Fred from\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The big bellied applicant cut him off. \u201cYeah, you\u2019re from the government and you\u2019re here to help me.\u201d He grinned and crunched Fred\u2019s hand.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Fred tried to hide his wince but now figured just how this was to go. \u201cSo, you have this application,\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Big belly cut him off. \u201cYeah, my accountant told me I could get you guys to pay for my fencing and irrigation on this rangeland I have here.\u201d He swept his arm out beyond the 3000 square foot mansion to the sage brush slope. \u201cSee, I think with some water this could be beautiful grassland. And I need a privacy fence all around it. Damn mountain bikers are all up in here.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Fred knew this was not going to go well, but he did his best.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWe give grants to promote improvement for livestock\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Belly cut him off. \u201cHell, you federales give grants to promote transgender livestock. Why can\u2019t I get some of your money to drill a well and build a fence?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Fred looked at the face. He was a belligerent, grinning man. He was sure he was right. He just wanted the government\u2019s money that Fred was in charge of.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Fred took a deep breath. He looked Big Belly in the eye. \u201cMister. Your application for federal grants cannot be approved. I can give you all the reasons, and I can cite the federal laws. But that will be in the report I send back to you.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Fred drove back down through the Idaho capital and out the connector to his single wide in Canyon County. He didn\u2019t think this interaction would help his performance evaluation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Fred got some really good pupusas at a truck in Caldwell before he went home.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He checked his work email as he opened a Budweiser on the kitchen table.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So, he now had to look for work.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Fred knew he was on the bubble. Federal workers all knew that, and he was a newbie, on probation since he\u2019d been hired here in Canyon County from the station back east. His expertise was grass and range and he … Continue reading